Rivals have been in the history pages from the very beginnings of time:
Romulus had Remus
Da Vinci had Michaelangelo,
Tom had Jerry,
Freddy had Jason
Batman had the Joker
Even Peter Griffin has Homer Simpson
And the Enigma has the Enema
http://www.the--enema.blogspot.com/
Yes, that's right. These masked crusaders do not only sit idle in our history books or in the media - truth be told, they create their own blogspots now and then.
Just like the Joker, this fellow blogspot-arian too has a veiled identity, a pseudonym - a, how-do-you-say, 'nom de plume' if you will. He follows an inspiration for people such as Ronald Dahl (forever in the shadows of his more famous older brother, Roald Dahl) and Ronald McDonald... perhaps even Ronald Reagan, who knows...
Just like the Joker , this literary fiend too has many a skill against his opponent. A power. A 'force' if you will. While the Joker had a peculiar knack for bombs, the Enema's uncanny ability involves the power of photoshop - as expressed in the 'delightful' picture below, to which, interestingly enough, my once-innocent-now-violated cartoon character looks like she is receiving an enema herself.
He perhaps, has the advantage in a quarrel - being as it may that he has known me ever since I was dubbed 'Jack' (a nickname of mine to which I had since birth. The meaning of the name I prefer not to elaborate on). Yet the underdog - through comic strip or through the TV screen, is always said to prevail! After all, I too have an advantage: this man works a full-time 'arduous' (the word arduous being emphasized) job whereas I get by on easy street being as it may that my delightful uni course allows me to read only a few books a week. Therefore, when attacking with my enigmatic forces of literary steel, his counterattack may take a while to arrive... Also, they say that 'strength lies in numbers' - judging by the enema's 39 facebook friends (refusing to make it 40 in order to be non-conformist) I think I have the upper hand...
Who knows where this sudden passion for revenge has come from. Perhaps it may be because of my school hours, perhaps it may be because he is jealous of my wit and good looks. Whatever it may be; know this Enema: YOU SHALL FEEL MY WRATH!!!!
Ouch, she doth wound me so... how did we get to this point?
ReplyDeleteThe Joker, in his latest incarnation was the darkest of all dark villians and yet he too knew that his nemesis in Batman was only, at best, one Pantone swatch away from his very own shade of blackness.
As a result of what was (we can only assume) a real lack of self awareness Batman ignored all the obvious signs and in doing so, denied the Joker!
And so today... (regretfully some may say) so too has The Enigma ignored all the obvious signs and in doing so, denied The Enema.
Ask any unwilling recipient of an enema to describe their experience & you will no doubt be told that it was an experience (noun) that was "mysterious, puzzling or difficult to understand"...
Ouch, she doth wound me so... :-(
RD
Oh Enema, you disappoint me... Here I was thinking I was going to be confronted by a worthy adversary but NAY!
ReplyDeleteYour argument seems to be focalized around paint swatches rather than responding to the intellectual philosophy that i confront you with.
Therefore, i challenge thee to a duel of wits!!!
*slaps you with a glove*
Go on, I dare you - write a blog that presents some meaningful words!! Go on! Respond to why Tarzan has no beard!! Write something other than what is clearly radiating of jealousy upon my part!! Or are you merely (dare i say it) a plagiarist?
*le gasp*
As my Dad says: put up, or shut up.
Warmest regards,
The Enigma
xoxo
why do i get the feeling that the enema is one of your sisters....
ReplyDeleteHelsinki
notice the use of the pronoun 'he' :S
ReplyDeletehaha! Nah, its my family friend although i still persist to call him zio :D
ah ok then. well i will censor my insults to them then....
ReplyDeleteHelsinki